Sunday, November 22, 2009

30 Days of Cookies!

Got this one off AOL! Thought it was worth keeping!

30 Days of Cookies

One basic cookies dough makes the building blocks for 30 different kinds of cookies -- just in time for the holidays. Grab the kids and get rolling.

by Sandy Gluck / Photo by Getty RF

Inspired to bake? Make cookies for a cause. Visit to see how some lovin' from your oven can help out Cookies for Kids' Cancer.

Basic Cookie Dough
Makes about 3 1/2 dozen cookies

1 2/3 cups all-purpose flour
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup (1 stick) butter, room temperature
1-cup sugar
1 large egg
3/4 teaspoon pure vanilla extract

1. In a small bowl, whisk together flour, baking powder, and salt. In a separate bowl, with an electric mixer, beat the butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Beat in the egg and vanilla until well combined.

2. With the mixer on low speed, beat in the flour mixture until just combined. Tear off 2 sheets of waxed paper, each about 12-inches. Spoon half the dough lengthwise down the center of each sheet of paper forming a strip about 8 inches long. With your hands, roll each strip into a log about 2 inches wide, and 1 inch thick. Wrap the logs up in the paper.

3. Freeze several hours until firm or freeze up to 3 months

4. To bake: preheat oven to 400. Line 2 baking sheets with parchment paper. Unwrap frozen dough and with a sharp knife, slice 1/4-inch thick. Bake until golden around the edges, rotating baking sheets from top to bottom and front to back. With a wide, thin metal spatula, remove from baking sheets to wire rack to cool completely.

1. Ginger Cookies: Add 3/4 teaspoon ground ginger and 1/8 teaspoon dry mustard powder to flour mixture. Beat 2 tablespoons finely chopped crystallized ginger in to mixture when adding egg.

2. Peanut Cookies: Grind enough peanuts to make 1/3 cup finely ground. Reduce flour to 1 1/3 cups and stir ground peanuts into remaining flour mixture. Add 2 tablespoons finely chopped peanuts when adding egg.

3. Espresso-Almond Cookies: Add 2 teaspoons instant espresso powder to flour mixture. Reduce sugar to 2/3 cup and add 1/3 cup packed light brown sugar. Add 1/8 teaspoon almond extract when adding vanilla. Fold in 1/3 cup sliced almonds after adding flour.

4. Molasses Cookies: Increase flour to 1 3/4 cups, swap in 1/4 cup packed dark brown sugar for 1/4 cup granulated, and add 3 tablespoons molasses when beating butter and sugar.

5. Citrus Cookies: Beat 2 tablespoons grated lemon, lime or a combo into mixture when adding egg.

6. Malted Milk Cookies: Add 2 tablespoons malted milk powder to flour mixture. Add 1/4 cup crushed malted milk balls when adding egg.

7. Cornmeal-Currant Cookies: Replace 1/3 cup of flour with 1/3 cup finely ground cornmeal. Stir 2 teaspoons grated lemon zest and 1/3 cup currants into mixture after adding flour.

8. Red-Hot Cookies: Finely crush 1/3 cup of red-hot candies and fold in when adding flour mixture.

9. Spice Cookies: Add 1 teaspoon ground cardamom, 1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon, and 1/8 teaspoon allspice to flour mixture.

10. Peanut Butter Chips: Reduce butter to 6 tablespoons. Add 2 tablespoons peanut butter. Fold in 3 tablespoons peanut butter chips when adding flour mixture.

11. Brown Butter: Melt butter over low heat until lightly browned and fragrant (do this in a pan that isn’t dark so you can see the change in color). Chill butter until firm then proceed with recipe as directed.

12. Toasted Coconut: Toast 1 cup of angel-flake coconut (the sweetened kind you get in the supermarket in bags) until golden brown. Grind a little more than half to get 1/3 cup ground and replace 1/3 cup of the flour with the ground coconut. Fold the remaining coconut in when adding the egg.

13. Chocolate-Chile Cookies: Remove 3 tablespoons of flour and replace with 3 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder. Add 3/4 teaspoon ancho or chipotle chile powder, and 1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon to flour mixture.

14. Granola Cookies: Coarsely shop 1/2 cup of your favorite granola and stir in when adding flour mixture.

15. Orange-Cranberry: Fold 1 tablespoon finely grated orange zest and 1/4 cup finely chopped dried cranberries into dough after adding flour mixture.

16. Black Forest: Beat 2 ounces of melted and cooled semisweet chocolate into dough after adding egg. Fold in ¼ cup finely chopped dried cherries after adding flour mixture.

17. White and Dark Chocolate: Remove 3 tablespoons of flour and replace with 3 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder. Reduce granulated sugar to 3/4 cup and add 1/4 cup packed light brown sugar. Fold in 1/3 cup chopped white chocolate after adding flour.
18. Double Chocolate: Remove 3 tablespoons of flour and replace with 3 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder. Fold in 1/3-cup mini chocolate chips after folding in flour.

19. Rocky Road: Beat 1/3-cup marshmallow fluff when beating butter and sugar. Increase vanilla to 1 teaspoon. Fold in 3 tablespoons mini chocolate chips and 2 tablespoons finely chopped pecans after folding in flour.

20. Carrot Cookies: Beat 1/2 cup of finely grated carrot into the mixture when adding egg. Swap in 1/3 cup maple sugar for 1/3 cup of regular sugar.

21. Pine Nut Cookies: Fold 1/4 cup of pine nuts into dough after adding flour mixture. Add 1/8 teaspoon almond extract along with vanilla.

22. Crispy Rice Cookies: Stir 2/3 cup of crisp puffed rice cereal into mixture when beating in flour mixture.

23. Sesame Cookies: Beat 2 teaspoons dark sesame oil and 3 tablespoons toasted sesame seeds into mixture when adding egg.

24. Apricot-Anise Cookies: Fold in 1 1/2 teaspoons anise seed and 1/4 cup finely chopped dried apricots after adding flour.

25. Cashew Cookies: Reduce butter to 6 tablespoons and add 2 tablespoons cashew butter. Add 1/4 teaspoon grated nutmeg to flour mixture. Fold in 1/3 cup finely chopped salted cashews after adding flour.

26. Sunflower Seed Cookies: Reduce butter to 6 tablespoons and add 2 tablespoons sunflower seed butter. Fold 2 tablespoons toasted hulled sunflower seeds and 1 teaspoon grated lemon zest to mixture after adding flour mixture.

27. Whole-Wheat Cinnamon Sugar Cookies: Replace 2/3 cup of flour with 2/3-cup whole-wheat pastry flour. Add 1-teaspoon ground cinnamon to flour mixture. Add 2 tablespoons brown sugar to sugar and butter mixture.

28. Toasted Oatmeal Cookies: Toast 1 1/2 cups rolled or quick cooking oats until fragrant and golden brown. Grind 1 cup of the oats and once ground measure and substitute for an equal amount of flour. Reduce sugar to 3/4 cup and add 1/4 cup light brown sugar. Fold remaining 1/2 cup oats into dough after adding flour.

29. Butterscotch Cookies: Reduce sugar to 1/2 cup and add 1/2 cup packed light brown sugar. Fold in 1/2 cup butterscotch morsels after adding flour.

30. Tropical Cookies: Fold 1/3 cup finely chopped dried pineapple, 1/4 cup finely chopped dried banana chips, and 2 teaspoons grated lime zest after adding flour.

Monday, October 26, 2009

Motherhood / Family Quotes!

1. By and large, mothers are the great vacationless class. - writer Anne Morrow Lindebergh
2. The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the famil nothing but leftovers. The original mal has never been found. - writier/humorist Calvin Trillin
3. Becoming a mothers makes you the mother of all children. From now on each wounded, abandoned, frightened child is yours. You live in the suffering mothers of every race and creed and weep with them. You long to comfort all who are desolute. - write Charlotte E. Gray
4. For a mother is the only person on earth who can divide her love among twn children and each child still have all her love. - Anonymous
5. Mothers, food, love and career - the four major guilt groups. - cartoonist Cathy Guisewite
6. A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car foreer after. - writie Peter DeVries
7. A man loves his sweetheart the most, his wife the best, but his mother the longest. - Irish Proverb
8. You go to work when you're sick, maybe even clinically depressed, because motherhood is perhaps the only unpaid position where failure to show up can result in arrest. - writer Mary Kay Blakely
9. Worse than just about anything else is the agonizing issue of how on earth anyone can bring a child into this world knowing full well that he or she is eventually going to have to go through the seventh and eighth grades. - writer Anne Lamott

From the Mom dictionary:
Hindsight: Perspective gained from changing innumerable diapers.
Geniuses: Your kids.
Racket:Sound produced by two or more boys above the age of 8.
Show-offs: Other peoples' kids.

Theoretical Mothers: Speedy exception is the mother of good fortune. - Proverb

  • Enthusiasm is the mother of effort, and without it nothing great was ever achieved. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
  • Hope is the companion of power, and mother of success; for who so hopes strongly has within him the gift of miracles. - write Samuel Smiles
Overheard Mom:

  • Motherhood. What is it but high stress 24/7, no pay, no holidays, and in the end everything is your damn fault.
Things ALL Mothers Say:

  • You're going to poke your eye out with that thing!
  • This is going to end in tears.
  • I'm going to give you until the count of three. One...two...

What all Mothers know:

  • Quiet does not necessarily mean good.
  • A magnifying glass can start a fire even on an overcast day.
  • You never turn on the oven without looking inside first.

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Household items for papercraft uses!

These ideas are compiled from and Gingerwood. Hope they give you ideas for new uses of household items. If you have some to include just email me. Put Crumbs & Morsels in the RE:

1. This past weekend I wanted to sand a piece of paper to distress it so it would match the other papers I was using. My little pieces of sand paper were way too harsh and were tearing up my paper so I asked my DH what else we had that I could try. He came up with one of those sponge sanding blocks used for drywall. They're dark red in color and have a very light grit to them. The sponginess makes it have some give so it doesn't tear my papers up. It worked so good I told DH he's not getting it back. He even said it could be washed if ever need be.

2. Baby wipes to clean up rubber stamps.

3. Lint rollers (the sticky kind) to clean off tiny paper scraps from work area.

4. Cotton swabs and make-up sponges for chalk and ink applicators.

5. Pan scrapper to use on the {Circut} mats to remove paper.

6. Nail block sander for distressing.

7. Emery boards (especially the black ones) for sanding.

8. Thread cutter - the round one with the little blades in grooves - for roughing the edges of paper.

9. Old electric fry pan for melting embossing powder, especially UTEE, from the bottom.

10. Drywall mesh tape instead of Magic Mesh.

11. Foam tape from hardware dept. to elevate items.

12. An old cookie sheet as a work surface for glitter and embossing projects.

13. Coffee filters are great for catching glitter or embossing powder. Easy to pour excess back into the containers.

14. Old mouse pads for punching little holes for brads.

15. Wood putty for sculpting embellishments - dries hard and can be tinted or painted.

16. Those plastic credit cards you get in the mail or even your own old cards. Great mat scrappers, use to adhere paper to mat, use in place of bone folders for scoring or making sharp folds in cardstock, lift small cuts off of mats.

17. Use the cheapest hairspray to set chalks.

18. Use a tracing wheel from your sewing basket. Swipe it across an ink pad and then on the paper and it looks like stitching.

19. Tic tac boxes are great for storing brads, beads, eyelets, safety pins, anysmall items.

20. Put a mouse pad under your sewing machine pedal - it doesn't move!!

21. Use an old spice rack to organize brads, eyelets, spiral clips, photo anchors, etc.

22. A fabric sheet wiped over the Cricut to keep down static.

23. Mess bags from fruits and veggies replace Magic Mesh.

24. Old cassette tape rack holds ink pads.

25. Corrugated packing from light bulb packages makes good backgrounds. It can be colored.

26. White Gum Eraser--erases tiny words off of those paint chips.

27. Many food products come in plastic containers with snap on lids. They come in various sizes and shapes and are great for storing a variety of items.

28. Paint edger pads work great for cleaning stamps.

29. A small wine rack to hold pens that need to be stored horizontially. Instead of wine bottles in the holes, use clear tennis ball cans {or Pringles cans, or disposable cups)} as the container.

30. White paper flowers at your local Walmart can be painted any color you want to match.

31. Remove buttons from worn out clothes. So easy!

32. Over the door shoe holder to store punches.

33. Rain gutter for rolls of ribbon.

34. Goo Gone to clean sticky stuff off of your scissors.

35. Punch through waxed paper to lubricate punches.

35. Punch through aluminum foil to sharpen punches.

36. Dental floss is good from removing photos from those old magnetic albums.

37. Mr. Clean Magic Easers to clean stamps.

38. Pants hanger is great for hanging spools of ribbon and wheels used for stamping projects.

39. Sushi grass from package, once washed makes great embellishments.

40. Spice bottles, or salt and pepper shakers to store embossing powders or microbeads.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Attaching Acetate

Last night I asked how to attach acetate headers to scrapbook paper or card stock, and those wonderful women on Gingerwood came up with the following ideas:

  • Glue dots behind "something" (a design on the acetate, if there is one)
  • Sew it on
  • Photo turns
  • Photo corners
  • A bit of tape runner under "something" that doesn't show

Saturday, April 4, 2009

Free Downloadable Pet Items

Wallpaper, stationery, coloring pages, games...

Free Pet Treat Recipes

Anyone who likes to make their own pet treats - here's the site...

Free Pet Projects

This site gives patterns for pet costumes, yard signs, pet beds, charms, and more. An adorable site.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Verses - Mushroom

From various sources!
  • Happy Birthday to one Fungi! (get it, one fun guy!!!!)
  • Just popping up to say hi.

Verses - Whale

From various sources! Substitute whale for well!

  • Wishing you a whale of a good time.
  • Wishing you whale wishes.
  • All is whale with the world!
  • Get whale!

Thursday, March 19, 2009

About Hot Flashes!

They aren't hot flashes, they are power surges!

Hot flashes: My own personal tropical vacation!

Hot flashes: My inner child playing with matches!

You know you are in menopause when you sell your furnace at a garage sale!

Saturday, March 7, 2009

Technique - Polish Stone

These come from various sources...

The look comes out to be a marble type. It would be a background. You need glossy paper, gold encore refill, bliss blue refill (your choice on color), alcohol, cotton balls and heat gun.
1 - randomly put tiny dabs onto glossy paper (too much will make it look too gold)
2 - pour alcohol into a little dish or lid
3 - dab the cotton ball into the alcohol
4 - drip a few drops of color refill onto the alcohol soaked cotton ball
5 - dab this all over the glossy paper (I didn't rub so I don't know if the rubbing works)
6 - you should have a color all over your glossy
7 - heat set and your background is done.Stamp image in Black on top or emboss in gold--Stipple butterfly looks great!

Polished stone #2 (sometimes called marbling)...
1-spray glossy cardstock with fine mist alcohol (rubbing or de-natured)
2-saturate a small piece of felt with alcohol
3-put a few drops of dye-based re-inker onto wet felt and dot on paper
4-repeat that process with one other color
5-with another piece of saturated felt I take a gold or silver (or any UM re-inker) re-inker and squeeze out a thin line on my felt. I then dot this in a few places on the paper.
6-when I am done with that I spray the whole piece of c.s. with the fine mist alcohol again so that the re-inkers move around and the metallic pigment starts to look like marble "veins".
7-I let it dry for about 30 seconds and put clear embossing powder over the whole thing and where ever the EP sticks to tells that that is where it needs to be set.

So I emboss it and it is ready to go. If you don't emboss then the pigment re-inker will never dry on the glossy c.s.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Technique - Shaving Cream

All instructions are given by someone other than myself. Hope it works for you!

Instruction for "Shaving Cream" Background
1. Fill the bottom of a container (I used plastic) with a layer of shaving cream (cheap 99 cent stuff) and spread it out with a spatula.
2. Take a couple of coordinating colors of reinkers and put drops in a random pattern all over the shaving cream.
3. Take something about the size of a marker to swirl the shaving cream around to mix it up a bit.
4. Now, with a piece of US card stock (card front size) press it into the shaving cream from the center out.
5. Remove the CS and scrape off the extra shaving cream with a spatula. I even dried off the extra bits with a dark colored towel OR a paper towel will probably work okay.
6. You have your awesome background!! You can repeat until you don't like the design you get.

Bits and Tips #4

Put magnets on the back of jumbo brads to use on your magnetic boards.

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Verses - Owl

These are from various sources! Any sentiment substituting Owl for I'll

  • Hoot, hoot, hurray!
  • Whooo loves you?
  • Whooooo's having a birthday?
  • WHOOO do you think you are, looking so good at your age?
  • Owl always be your friend!
  • Owl Miss You!
  • Owl be thinking of you!"
  • Owl always love you!
  • Hoo loves you baby?
  • Owl be seeing you soon!
  • Owl be thinking of you!

Friday, January 30, 2009

Re-inker Uses

We were discussing re-inkers on a rubber stamping board, and this link came up. I'll print the uses here, but also give you the link. It's on a really neat blog. The ideas are using Stampin' Up re-inkers, but it is my belief that other brands would do the same things.

1. Re-ink your stamp pads: Use the coordinating re-inkers to keep those 48 Stampin' Up! colors bright. You really don't have to buy a new ink pad when one drys up.
2. Shaving Cream Technique: Use them to make your own background paper using cheap shaving cream. It is a little messy but so much fun.
3. Use with a Paintbrush, Aqua Painter or Blender Pen to color your stamped images.
4. Make a beautiful glitter Christmas Ornaments. I know Christmas is over but you can remind me next year.
5. Mix Crystal Effects and Re-Inkers- you can even add dazzling diamond glitter to this for a nice effect on your stamping project
6. Color the white flowers in the Pretties Kit to match your project.
7. Bubble Background Technique- nice background for water or fish cards.
8. Re-ink your 48 colors of Stampin' Up! Markers #1. * Stampin' Up! does NOT recommend doing this. It is just something some that can be done to extend the life of their markers. You do this at the risk of ruining the marker and thereby having to replace it anyway. Carefully and gently remove the wide tip of the marker. Fill a small container with the coordinating color of re-inker. Place the brush tip of the marker that you've removed into the container that has the re-inker fluid in. Allow to soak from 10 minutes to 24 hours depending on how dry the tip was. Add several amounts of re-inker to the barrel of the marker. Re-insert the brush tip into the barrel of the marker. Do so gently and carefully. I have never done this but have been given these instructions by other demonstrators.
9. Re-ink your 48 colors of Stampin' Up! Markers #2. Another suggestion from a long-time demonstrator is to not remove the tip from the barrel. Just put some re-inker into a clear film canister and let the marker sit in it for a while. The marker will suck up all the ink it needs. Then wipe the tip & replace the cap. Lay the marker flat to allow the ink to travel to the small tip as well. It's a lot less messy!
10. Dye Ribbon: Use the re-inkers to dye white ribbon to have matching ribbon for your project. Make sure to let it dry prior to using it.
11. Marble Technique for a different background using real marbles.
12. Bubble Wrap or Sandwich wrap dabbed in reinker to make a unique background.
13. Sponging your projects.
14. Baby Wipe Technique.
15. Polished Stone Technique using metallic reinker also.

Blog link:

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Bits and Tips #3

I was shopping the mark down after Xmas at Walmart and stumbled across their left over holiday ribbons. They had a green plush ribbon, the kind of texture they used to have in fuzzy books when I was a kid. And right away my mind thought that would be great for diecutting my Sizzix shamrock. Got this huge roll of WIDE ribbon for 75 cents. Just tried it and it makes the neatest shamrocks, SO I am now going to use some RED I got a while back for valentine hearts. (From Sharanlee)

Sunday, January 25, 2009

Today's Quote!

“Find something you’re passionate about and keep tremendously interested in it.”

That applies to anything and everything in life!

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Bits and Tips #2

Whenever I get a new punch I use it on cardstock that I have rubbed with Bee's Wax. Run the wax on both sides of cardstock. Then be sure to punch a couple times on an other piece of cardstock in case of extra wax being in punch. will not harm punch. (From Janice Wallerich)

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Recycling Ideas!

These are from my friends at Gingerwood. They know how to stretch a buck, using things that come into the house for crafting. If you know of a good recycling idea, share it with us. Email me!

From Patsy
I save netting from onion bags.I have used on lighthouse & Mermaid cards--can weave fuzzy green yarn through to resemble seaweed.

Jigsaw puzzle pieces can be painted over with PH Martin ink or similar ones...then while assembled stamp over ---really cool results.

The insides of lightbulb boxes are cool!

From Mrs. C.
I use old giftwrap to line envelopes.

From Diane B.
I saved all the Christmas catalogs and colorful ads from magazines and made Christmas Mosaic cards this year. I used the square punch to isolate images, then assembled them on cardstock, used Krylons to border them, and clear embossed the whole thing to make multicolored and multi-imaged tiles. I had hundreds of punched images to use, and was able to make a lot of cards.

From Marcia D.
Cutting up a calendar into envelopes to use for our birthday list cards.

From Catherine Mace
I use catalogs/phone book for gluing layers, etc., , then toss....nft

From Connie in MO
I use those free AOL (or other) CD's we get all the time for a pallate for my water markers that I use blender pens in or watercolor brushes, wipe up clean and use again.

From Ging
I use the wrapping paper that I got the gift in and use it as my background paper for my thank you card for the gift.
Snowflake punches also make good embellishments on most xmas paper so the cards are pretty easy. It's thoughtful too because it is part of the gift they gave YOU!

Author Unknown:
The insides of envelopes can be used for iris folding or background paper. There are lots of different patterns and colors are primarily blue, black, or brown. Envelopes from bank statements or bills are good sources.

From Rebecca:
I used a pile of Dove foil chocolate wrappers to cover plain brass brads like you get from an office supply store. It dressed them up, and I hated to waste the pretty foil. You can get about 6 brads with 1 wrapper. just tear or punch out a circle big enough to wrap over, arround and under the brad head. Being a heavier foil, it doesn't require an adhesive.

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Mom / Mother / Mother-to-Be Quotes

These come from a Page-a-Day calendar. Enjoy!

1. Anyone who thinks the art of conversation is dead ought to tell a child to go to bed. - humorist Robert Gallagher
2. Motherhood: All love begins and ends there. - poet Robert Browning
3. I must take issue with the term ‘a mere child,’ for it has been my invariable experience that the company of a mere child is infinitely preferable to that of a mere adult.
- writer Fran Lebowitz
4. Men are what their mothers made them. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
5. Having a family is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain. - comedian Martin Mull
6. Misery is when you make your bed and then your mother tells you it's the day she's changing the sheets. - writer Suzanne Heller
7. You know you're a mom when...
You cry at all first for the firstborn: the first day of kindergarten, the first school bus, the first sleepover - in other words, every small step that takes your baby away.
8. Mother - that was the bank where we deposited all our hurts and worries. - Rev. T. DeWitt Talmage
9. The surest way to get your teenage son to be quiet? When he gets home, ask him where he's been. - Anonymous
10. Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city. - George Burns
11. Raising kids is a mother of a job... Clearly it does take a village. And a lot of coffee. - Amy Rosenthal
12. My mother never told me 'how' to live, she just lived, and I watched and learned how to live myself. - Anonymous
13. My mother was the making of me. - Thomas Edison
14. One of the sad realities of being a parent is that the same stuff you know is exciting, educational, and enriching in your child's life is often messy, smelly, and exhausting to deal with. - Joyce Maynard
15. The best moments for imparting wisdom aren't ones that are planned, they're the ones that happen spontaneously. - Anonymous
16. I looked on child rearing not only as a work of love and duty but as a profession that was fully as interesting and challenging as any honorable profession in the world and one that remanded the best that I could bring to it. - Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy
17. Home is where teenagers go to refuel. - Anonymous
18. It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snow blower, or vacuum cleaner. - magician/performer Ben Bergor
19. I remember my mother's prayers and they have always followed me. They have clung to me all my life. - Abraham Lincoln
20. Love the whole world as a mother loves her only child. - unknown
21. Motherhood is the second oldest profession in the world. It never questions age, height, religious preference, health, political affiliation, citizenship, morality, ethnic background, marital status, economic level, convenience, or previous experience. - humorist Erma Bombeck
22. My mother's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it. - comedian Buddy Hackett
23. There are only two things a child will share willingly - communicable diseases and his mother's age. - pediatrician/writer Benjamin Spock
24. There are three ways to get something done: do it yourself, emply someone, or forbid your children to do it. - writer/editor Monta Crane
25. No matter how old you are, you still want your mom to be proud of you. - book quote
26. Death, taxes and childbirth! There's never any convenient time for any of them - wirtier Margaret Mitchell.
27. The best compliment to a child or a friend is the feeling you give him that he has been set free to make his own inquiries, to come to conclusioins that are right for him, whether or not they coincide with your own. - Alistar Cooke
28. I believe tht if I keep a stack of parenting books on my nightstand and another two shelves' worth crammed into my booksace, then my children, simply by occupying the same airspace as such wisdom, will become angelic and obedient. - writer Michele Sbrana
29. Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult. - Charlotte Whitton, former mayor of Ottawa
30. Boys: of all wild beasts, the most difficult to manage. - Plato
31. If it's not one thing, it's your mother. - bumper sticker.
32. Each of my kids was so different that none prepared me for the next. Not only that, but I messed up in completely different ways with each of them. - Anonymous
33. Children have never been very good at listening to adults, but they never failed to imitate them. - writer James Baldwin
34. A wise parent humors the desire for independent action, so as to become the friend and advisor when his absolute rule shall cease.
35. You know you're a mom're no longer surprised to find yourself talking to strangers about poop, breast pumps, stretch marks, and your most secret worries.
36. There are times when parenthood seems nothing but feeding the mouth that bites you. - Writer Peter DrVries
37. Another good thing about being poor is that when you are seventy your children will not have declared you legally insane in order to gain control of your estate. - Woody Allen
38. Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home. - Bill Cosby
39. I love all my children, but some of them I don't like. - Lillian Carter, mother of President Jimmy Carter
40. Snow an adolescence are the only problems that disappear if you ignore them long enough. - Columnist Earl Wilson
41. Sometimes people ask me: 'Dave, what is the essence of parenthood?' I always answer: 'Lowering your standards.' - Humorist Dave Barry
42. Children are the hands by which we take hold of heaven. - Orator/Clergyman Henry Ward Beecher
43. Sometimes the laughter in mothering is the recognition of the ironies and absurdities. Sometimes, though, it's just pure, unthinking delight. - writer Barbara Schpiro
44. A woman came to ask the doctor if a woman should have children after thirty-five. He said, 'Thirty-five children is enough for any woman.' - comedian Gracie Allen
45. The art of being wise is the art of knowing what to overlook. - philosopher/psychologist William James
46. Art is the child of Nature; yes, her darling child, in whom we trace the features of the mother's face, her asoect, and her attitude. - poet Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
47. One of the greatest unexpected pleasures of breastfeeding is how it slows down time. The zen of motherhood: Eight to ten times a day, you get to kick back and let down. - writer Kate T. Morgan
48. I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on. - comedian Roseanne Barr
49. Many children, many cares; no children, no felicity. - Chinese proverb
50. All parents believe their children can do the impossible. They thought it the minute we were born, and no matter how hard we've tried to prove them wrong they all think it about us now. And the really annoying thing is they're probably right. - cartoonist Cathy Guisewite
51. My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint. - humorist Erma Bombeck
52. It's inevitable that you will let your children down. No one brings up children without doing grievous things... But children are resilient - you don't lose your child through one mistake. - child psychiatrist Robert Shaw
53. As far as I can tell, there are no logical reasons to have children... They're worse than men. They like you for a while otherwist known as the "Happy Meal Years,' when they can be bough for $1.99. They love you then they leave you. And most often you're broke as hell by the time they go. - Felicia Blasi in Ophelia's Mom, by Nina Shandler
54. I cook everything my mother's way. She cooks her mother's way. And we both learned from our mothers-in-law. Our recipes and they carry history with them. - chef Annie DeRoberts
55. My other has always been unhappy with what I do. She would rather I do something nicer, like be a bricklayer. - Mick Jagger

Things ALL mothers say...
  • You can't start the day on an empty stomach.
  • Who do you think you are?
  • Two wrongs do not make a right.
  • You've got some explaining to do.
  • You're not going anywhere until you clean up this mess.
  • I can't hear myself think!

Overheard Mom:

  • There should be a special club for those of us who've read "Goodnight Moon" twice each night for over a year.
  • Lamaze classes to ease the agonizing pain of deliver? What a joke. I'll tell you what Lamaze is good for: When you're stuck on a grocery line with a screaming toddler and absolutely all you can do is take deep breaths.
  • My kids didn't grow gradually; they took great, unexpected leaps forward (and sometimes backward) that always caught me by surprise.
  • My kid invented the 'mother tax.' I have to pay him a quarter every time I eat something off of his plate without asking him first.
  • Like hell it gets easier! The kids just get bigger, moodier, dirtier, louder - and then, suddenly, like after a tornado, they're gone and it's way too quiet.
  • It happens like clockwork: I haul in five bags of groceries, put everything away, and as if on cue, my two boys stomp in open the fridge, and say, 'There's never anything to eat!'
  • Have you ever once read about nursing in a public toliet, changing a diaper on the sidewalk, or what it's like to ride public transit with vomit all over your blouse? None of the baby magazines and child care books give a clue how totally chaotic and insane new motherhood is. But what can, except going through it yourself?

From the Mom dictionary:

  • Jackpot: When the kids sleep over at Grandma's for the night.
  • Junk: Anything that belongs to Dad.
  • Magic: A child's kiss.
  • Ask your father: No
  • It all depends: Ask
  • Maybe: No
  • Later: Never
  • Afterbirth: When the hard part begins.
  • Baby: Dad, when he gets a cold; Mom's youngest child, even when he's (she's) 50.
  • Energy: The awesome vitality all children possess in abundance until asked to wash the dishes, pick up their clothes, or go out to get a carton of milk.

Moms Anonymous

  • Sometimes I make up a reason to go to the store right after dinner so that my husband has to handle the kids' bath an bed time. I drive veeeeery slowly and when I get there, I wander down every aisle and then pick the longest check-out line. - Becky, mother of 4
  • You'd think my three-year-old would be the one to lose it at the doctor's, but I had a complete mother meltdown. Between the wait, the screaming babies, the coughing toddlers - I just lost it. I half expected the nurse to give me a time-out.
  • I'm always one of the last moms in the carpool line.

A screaming baby is a blessing...

  • When the friendly life-insurance salesman rings the doorbell.
  • When your mother-in-law calls for an extended catch-up.
  • When your husband wants to describe every shot of his 36-hole day.

Good News: Every time you hand the baby to someone else, he starts to scream. Bad News: He likes you best!

Overheard Grandmother: Don't stress the small stuff... 'cause, looking back, believe me - 99% of it is small stuff!

High crimes against teenage boys:

  • Noticing any change in his appearance or grooming habits.
  • Implying in any way that he has a crush on someone.
  • Using the word "awesome" in front of his friends.

How to get your child's attention:

  • Pick up the phone.
  • Sit down at the computer.
  • Start to make dinner.
  • Ask for some private time.

The parent/teacher conference:

  • What the teacher says: Ashley is quite the chatterbox! I've moved her desk next to mine to that the other students can concentrate. She's much more interested in what everyone else is doing than in her own work. We're trying to address that. What the mom hears: She'll be the next Oprah!

Motherhood: A job description!

  • Must possess the physical stamina to keep pace with a toddler on a tricycle, a preadolescent on a soccer team, a teenager on God-knows-what, while producing three square , balanced , tasty, and nutritious meals every day for a minimum of 18 years.
  • Must possess basic working knowledge of first aid, product safety, playground physics, childproof, tamper-proof, and adult-proof packaging, and fervently believe in the magical healing power of ice packs.
  • Must be able to endure being despised, ignored, irrelevant - at least until someone really needs a ride, at which point you'll instantly become "the greatest."

Sunday, January 4, 2009

Non-Hallmark Card Verses

Got these from my sister-in-law. Some are funny, some are insulting, you decide whether you want to use them. :)

1. I always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love. After meeting you ...
(inside card) I changed my mind

2. I must admit, You brought religion into my life ...
(inside card) I never believed in Hell until I met you

3. As the days go by, I think how lucky I am ...
(inside card) That you're not here to ruin it for me

4. Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go ...
(inside card) Will you take the knife from my back? You'll probably need it again

5. Someday I hope to marry ...
(inside card) Someone other than you

6. Happy birthday! You look great for your age ... (inside card) Almost lifelike!

7. When we were together, you said you'd die for me ... (inside card) Now we've broken up, I think it's time to keep your promise

8. We've been friends for a very long time ...
(inside card) What do you say we stop?

9. I'm so miserable without you ...
(inside card) It's almost like you're still here

10. Congratulations on your new bundle of joy ... (inside card) Did you ever find out who the father is?

11. You are such a good friend, if we were on a sinking ship and there was only one life jacket ... (inside card) I'd miss you terribly and think of you often

12. Your friends and I wanted to do something really special for your birthday ...
(inside card) So we're having you put to sleep

13. Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad! (Available only in Alabama, Mississippi, and West Virginia)

14. Looking back over the years we've been together, I can't help but wonder ...
(inside card) What was I thinking?

15.Congratulations on your wedding day! ...
(inside card) Too bad no one likes your husband

16. How could two people as beautiful as you ... (inside card) Have such an ugly baby?

Saturday, January 3, 2009

Uses for Fiber / Ribbon

Feel free to email me with additional ideas for this list...

1. Map out your vacation route with fiber threaded through eyelets.
2. Use as laces on paper-pieced shoes.
3. Make a frame around a matted photo.
4. Tie through the hole of a tag.
5. Use in a sports scene as a basketball hoop, soccer net, or to make a fishing pole.
6. Create grass or trees.
7. Spell out a title using fibers to stitch around letters.
8. Wrap around a corner accent.
9. Make hair for paper dolls.
10. Use as string for balloon die cuts.
11. Tie lassos for western pages.
12. Create seaweed on an ocean or vacation page.
13. Attach a tail to a kite.
14. Build a mountain/water outline.
15. Use as rope for a tug of war scene.
16. Ropes on a swing.

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Uses for Eyelets & Brads

70 uses for eyelets & brads
1. connectors on paper piecing for moveable parts
2. attaching vellum
3. accents on journal blocks
4. to "hang" things from
5. center of flowers
6. center of letters
7. spell out words (outline letters)
8. corners of picture mat
9. eyes of paper dolls
10. nails in a fence
11. earrings for a paper doll
12. belly button jewel for a paper doll
13. "stone" in a ring
14. buttons on a snowman
15. decoration on a child's ball
16. stepping stones on a garden layout
17. attach a fiber to a brad to make a yo-yo
18. attach elements on a page by wrapping wire or fiber
19. to form "bullets" for a list of things
20. as an accent on the tail of a letter
21. in the hole of a tag
22. white - as stars on a black or navy blue sky
23. white - as dropping snowflakes
24. light blue - as falling raindrops
25. orange - as pumpkins
26. white - as moonbeams
27. jeweled belt on a paper doll
28. brown - as chocolate chips on a cookie
29. toppings on a pizza
30. M & Ms
31. buttons on a shirt
32. decorations on an Easter egg
33. decorations on a Christmas tree
34. purple - grapes in a cornucopia
35. lights on top of a police car or fire truck
36. center of a pinwheel
37. center of tires
38. tires on a toy car
39. end of antenna on a bug
40. center of fiber spider web
41. hair ornament on a girl paper doll
42. the "dot" on an i or j
43. attach handle to a basket
44. to attach fibers or lacing something together
45. attach a sign to a post
46. rocks
47. center of propeller on an airplane
48. on serendipity squares
49. sesame seeds on a bun
50. jeweled skirt on a paper doll
51. use as a spider and paint a face on it with the legs behind it or use wire for it's legs
52. dots on a ladybug
53. as fillers
54. use as nails on wood (like haunted house windows)
55. Christmas Bulbs on a tree paper piecing
56. eye on a frog
57. use to embellish the corner of tags or
58. borders or
59. titles
60. Attach fabric, twistel or lace to paper
61. use star brads to replicate a night sky
62. ends of a hammock
63. use on butterfly wings
64. oval nail heads as Easter Eggs
65. Buttons on a dress
66. shoe buckle
67. dots on a clown suit doll or paper piecing
68. sprinkles on an ice cream cone
69. sprinkles on a cupcake
70. use seashell nail heads on paper torn sand paper to create a beach look